‘Justice’ Is Done

Today was the day that we had been waiting for. The time had come for her to come up against our legal system, face what she had done and hear what her actions have caused my family and I.
Unfortunately things did not go our way.

Sitting in the waiting area, after a complete sleepless night for us both, James and I were exhausted. We kept ourselves busy with reading, music, iPads and phones.
There was a mixture of nervousness and anticipation.
This was a whole new experience and I had no idea what the outcome would be. I kept expecting to see her appear from somewhere but as the case was called after a two hour wait it became apparent that she was hidden away in a side room.
Seeing her there, in front of me, didn’t bring the reaction in me that I thought it would. I wasn’t scared, angry or upset. I felt totally numb. This was the woman who had turned my life upside down and I felt absolutely nothing. I couldn’t see her face as she was facing the Judges. I could however see the faces of her relatives. Her son looked smug throughout the entire hearing. Occasionally he exchanged words with his partner that resulted in chuckles. What could they have to laugh about? Me sitting there nervously waiting? The fact that my leg was encased in a metal cage? Whatever their reasons it filled me with disgust. Do they have no shame?

The CPS read out their argument first, failing entirely to read my victim impact statement (for which I am going to complain) and then her solicitor had his time.
Apparently, at the time she didn’t realise that it was actually her that had run me over. It has only been since the evidence has been presented to her that she realises that it must have been her. According her solicitor she is ‘deeply sorry and full of regret’. Well, how nice of her. Who exactly is she sorry to because I sure haven’t received any of her apologies.

She pleaded guilty to driving with undue care and attention.
Hearing her say those words bought a blanket of relief. I breathed easy for the fist time sitting there.
My ease was short lived though.
Because of early guilty plea they dropped the charges for failing to stop and failing to report an accident.
She was fined £90 plus costs and given six penalty points.
That’s it. Our legal system has performed ‘justice’.

I don’t want to rant about how the system has let me down. I do believe that we are lucky to have a legal system in which everyone has the right to a proper defence and trial.
However I do feel incredibly let down. Sitting there in court today and listening to what was said, I don’t feel that a true account of what happened on that day was given at all. All they’ve heard is that she ran me over accidentally and is apparently really sorry. They didn’t hear about the true extent of the injuries, the hours of pain I have suffered, the anguish my children have been through as a result.
How is that justice? Someone, please explain it to me as I am totally and utterly lost.

My head cannot process the fact that you can be charged with three offences, and just because you plead guilty to one of them (as though you are being the helpful one) you can just be let off of the others. It doesn’t make you any less guilty of them so why shouldn’t you be punished for them?

On reflection, the CPS solicitor was utter rubbish. He mumbled his way through, wasn’t sure of his facts and acted as though he’d rather be anywhere but there.
Should I have employed my own solicitor? I wasn’t even told if that was an option?
I feel totally and utterly cheated.
Through no fault of my own I was run over, both of my legs broken leaving me and my family distraught and lost. She has received no punishment that will have any affect on her.
How is this fair?
You can run someone over and callously leave them there and all you face is six points and a pathetic fine.
I will be left with this for the rest of my life and the memories will always haunt me. The nightmares, the panic attacks, the pain, the fear ……

I think she sleeps soundly at night.

I am trying really hard not to be angry as I know it will do no good however I am failing. I have never known what true anger is until now. It is running through my bones and I cannot stop it. I am fighting back the tears as I am too scared that they won’t stop.
Until now I didn’t, but right now I actually despise her.
What kind of vile human being is she?

How do I move on from this with the knowledge that she has suffered nothing yet I am still suffering today, almost 13 weeks later and still have a long journey ahead?

I feel so unbearably distraught.

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10 thoughts on “‘Justice’ Is Done

  1. After going through so much, this outcome is bitterly cruel. Not only to you, for the pain and suffering you are going through and will still be going through when the ink is dry on this case, but also for your family. For Charlie for witnessing this and her suffering, for the boys being without their mummy, for your gorgeous hubby for his anguish and pain watching you go through what you’ve been through and for your extended family and friends who have been through this with you.

    However, what is done is done, que sera sera as the old song says. I am sure you will go through a heap of emotions over the next few days while you come to terms with this new blow.

    I think there has been enough pain for you all. I hope you are able to move on from this and look forward to your full recovery knowing that one day Karma will turn up and you’ll have your revenge! 🙂

    Sending loads of love to you and your family Kerry, keep smiling 🙂

    Tia xxx

  2. Oh my gosh – I am dumbfounded that the penalty for committing such crimes is so low. It is absolutely ridiculous. My heart goes out to you, James and the children as this really does not seem right. Our justice system is really not sending the right message here 😦 xxxxxxxxx

  3. I am so sorry that you have had to go through any of this – but today somehow seems the unfairest of the lot. We are all thinking of you and wondering where we start writing letters of complaint to…..

  4. This is awful, we hear too many stories like this. Maybe you should consider the possibility of perusing a private prosecution to seek justice?

    • I wasn’t even aware that was an option? I thought if you had been convicted in a court then that was it?
      We have a civil case to sue her however that will be paid from her insurance company, the only affect directly on her is an increase in premiums X

      • Get a grip, stop feeling so sorry for yourself and move on – people are suffering with a lot worse than you and keep going without all the sympathy cries – YOU ARE NOT DYING!!!

      • Thanks for your comment, whoever you are, too scared to put your real name??

        No-one is making you read my blog so why don’t you just not read it? Simple!!

  5. I’d second that motion… This is taken directly from wikipedia:

    There are many different types of blogs, differing not only in the type of content, but also in the way that content is delivered or written:

    Personal blogs
    The personal blog, an ongoing diary or commentary by an individual, is the traditional, most common blog. Personal bloggers usually take pride in their blog posts, even if their blog is never read. Blogs often become more than a way to just communicate; they become a way to reflect on life, or works of art. Blogging can have a sentimental quality. Few personal blogs rise to fame and the mainstream but some personal blogs quickly garner an extensive following. One type of personal blog, referred to as a microblog, is extremely detailed and seeks to capture a moment in time. Some sites, such as Twitter, allow bloggers to share thoughts and feelings instantaneously with friends and family, and are much faster than emailing or writing.

    Personally I think blogs are a way for people to vent, talk about the important things in their life, rather than taking out their issues/problems/heart ache on the ones closest to them. In my experience people either hide from what’s going on in their life and take their anquish out on others, or they talk about it. Kerry obviously feels that writting a blog is her way to release this anquish. And Like Kerry quite rightly says “No-one is making you read my blog so why don’t you just not read it? Simple!!”

    However, you did get something right, Kerry is not dying and there are others out there suffering. Take the children in third world countries; famine; poverty; disease… All of this touches my heart more than anything. But I will not take anything away from Kerry as her ordeal has been horrible and I would not wish that upon anyone! What is deemed as important and heartfelt to one, may not be seen as such by another. Kerry wants to write this blog to help her through this difficult time for her and her family. I say let her! If you don’t like it, you don’t have to read it… Sometimes life is just that simple!

    Everyone has a choice in life, so why waste your time, and everyone else’s, by reading something that you clearly don’t care about?

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